I Want a Divorce But I’m Scared: What Should I Do?

1. Consider Legal Separation

If you are not completely certain that you want to end your marriage but you still want to protect yourself financially or maintain health insurance coverage, you may want to learn more about legal separation. Legal Separation is a process in Arizona where a married couple can live apart and divide their finances while remaining married.  It is not intended to be a step “on the way” to divorce, but it may be a more appropriate outcome for you and your spouse than dissolving the marriage. Filing for legal separation is not the same as informally agreeing to live apart (like a “timeout period”), but this might also be an option to consider before making a major decision about whether to remain married. Learn more about legal separation vs divorce

2. Talk to a Divorce Counselor or Communication Coach

It is very common that a person who feels he/she is at a crossroads in the marriage would seek input from a divorce counselor or a communication coach. Just as a marriage counselor helps a couple to navigate their marriage, a divorce counselor can help guide couples through the divorce process. Pre-divorce counseling could be used to explore and confirm your decision to divorce.. A communication coach might be able to guide you through your divorce as well by helping you to identify and communicate your particular needs and concerns.

3. Put Your Needs First

Some couples stay married “because of the children.” However, if parents are not able to live and work together as effective co-parents, living in different homes may be a better situation for the children. Depending on your circumstances, you may be faced with the difficult decision of whether your children would be better off in a home where their parents are living together but “unhappy” or in two separate homes where their parents are living apart but at peace.

4. Join a Divorce Support Group

Talking to other people who have gone through, or are going through, the same experience as you can be empowering and inspiring. Plus, you might find that others had the same fears as you. Learning how other people deal with their fears might give you some ideas about how you can deal with yours. You are not alone.

5. Research Peaceful Divorce Options

If you are worried that divorce has to be a long, drawn-outbattle in court, rest assured that there are a number of options for you to consider. Collaborative divorce, for example, focuses on the needs of the entire family This process may take less time and cost less than traditional divorce litigation, which is often better for the kids. Divorce mediation is another out-of-court option where you and your spouse hire a neutral third-party mediator to help you come to a peaceful resolution. These types of out of court divorce options can make divorce less emotionally draining for you, your spouse, and your children.

Source:

1. Karen Covy, et al. “9 Tips for Managing Your Fear of Divorce.” Karen Covy, 5 Oct. 2017, karencovy.com/9-tips-managing-fear-divorce/.
2. Veland, Cherilynn. “Afraid of Divorce? 15 Reasons Not To Be.” Psych Central.com, 21 Jan. 2018, blogs.psychcentral.com/psychology-women/2015/02/afraid-of-divorce-15-reasons-not-to-be/.

See Also:

• Tips to End Your Marriage Peacefully
• How, when, and where to tell your spouse you want a divorce
• How to Get the Courage to Divorce

Collaborative Divorce Is a Peaceful Divorce Option

Divorce litigation can be scary and emotionally draining for you, your spouse, and your children. But it doesn’t have to be that way with collaborative divorce. The collaborative process can result in a less expensive, more efficient, and less harmful outcome for everyone involved. The legal, financial, and communication professionals at Best Legal Choices can help you navigate this difficult time in your life.