4 tips for a healthy separation
Written by Jennifer Moshier

4 tips for a healthy separation

Separation is often a prelude to divorce. Sometimes, it’s a last attempt to save a marriage. If a separation will be ending in divorce, working with a group of professionals who focus on the collaborative divorce process can help both parties navigate this emotionally-charged process more peacefully. Here are four tips to help achieve a healthy separation from your spouse:


Communication is often a major problem in marriages that are crumbling, and it’s even more essential part of for a good separation whether you reconcile or not. While you may not be able to find common ground on everything, it’s important to remain respectful throughout your separation and divorce. Open, objective and honest communication is the key to an amicable separation. Regulating emotions and focusing on the goal should be kept in the forefront of the process – regardless of your reasons for separating.

You may ask yourself how you are supposed to communicate effectively now if you couldn’t communicate well during your marriage. If you’re stuck in the habit of fighting about every little detail, you’ll need help to manage your emotions and responses during a collaborative divorce. Your communication specialist can help you and your spouse develop your communication skills. It’s important to approach these conversations while tempering anger, resentment, or frustration. Avoid re-hashing past arguments or assigning blame for issues within your marriage. Keep the focus of your conversations on the future.

Model Behavior

During your separation, it’s important to be aware of the behavior you exhibit in regards to your spouse, especially if there are children involved. Even though your marriage is in trouble, demeaning or bad-mouthing your partner can and will create more problems and stress for both of you. Whether you’re confiding in a close friend, posting on social media or talking with your children about what’s happening to the family dynamics, treating your spouse as the “enemy” can be detrimental to your situation and cause unintended consequences, making a healthy separation nearly impossible.


Effective communication between you and your spouse can help avoid some of the emotional and financial hardships often associated with a traditional divorce. During your separation, try to work together to find an amicable middle ground. This will allow for a healthy separation and lay the foundation for a stable and positive future.

Open, transparent communication is essential to achieving a healthy separation. Both parties should work to avoid criticism and judgments during conversations. Transparency will show your spouse that you can be trusted to navigate this difficult time with integrity. It’s important to have discussions about topics such as how much money is coming and going, future expectations and goals going forward.

Consider Your Options

Whether you’re trying to save your marriage or you’re ready to call it quits, it’s important to consider your options. In some cases, mediation or marriage counseling can help sort out issues and put your marriage back on the right track.

If you’ve decided that ending your marriage is the right choice for you, consider your divorce options. Determining what type of divorce experience you want is the next step. There are many benefits to choosing a collaborative process when you want a divorce following a healthy separation.

If you’re ready to move forward with your divorce, contact a Best Legal Choices professional today to help you navigate the process.