Divorce tends to bring a lot of emotions for both spouses. Every divorce is different, so there’s no single path to feeling better. The length of your relationship plays a role, and so does the way it ends. Sometimes, women and men cope with divorce differently.
During a collaborative divorce, you’ll have the opportunity to work with legal, financial and communication professionals who can help you work through any issues related to your divorce. Here are three tips to help you cope:
1. Address Your Feelings
One of the first steps you need to take is to address your feelings. For men, working through feelings may not come easily. When men cope with divorce, they need to move past this.
Emotions might get in the way if you don’t deal with them directly. Studies have proven that stress can lead to significant health issues. Divorce is stressful enough without trying to cover up your feelings and pretend like everything is okay. Finding ways to address them is critical to coming out stronger on the other side.
No one goes into marriage expecting a divorce. Blaming or punishing yourself for past mistakes serves no purpose in your future. Instead, reflect on what went wrong and move forward. Instead of bottling it up, find a way to let go.
Start by finding someone you can trust and talk to them. This may be a friend, family member or even a therapist. Building trust with them will help you feel comfortable opening up. Your team of professionals in a collaborative divorce may even help you to identify someone for this role. Finding that trusted sounding board can make a big difference in helping men cope with divorce.
2. Spend Time on Self-Improvement
Of course, facing feelings by itself is not enough. Men cope with divorce better when they start to move forward. One way to do so is to find ways to work on yourself.
After a divorce, self-esteem can take a hit. This means different things to everyone. Some men cope with divorce by working out to get in shape. Others may want to read more or learn something new. For many, focusing on a hobby can help lift spirits quickly. Some men seek solace through prayer or other religious activities that help to strengthen their relationship with God.
Whatever the plan, men cope with divorce better when they can direct their focus. After the frustration of a failing marriage, working on self-improvement can be a helpful way to move forward.
3. Focus on the Future
Another way men cope with divorce effectively is to focus on their future. Even if you can’t save your marriage, you may be able to salvage a friendship. Divorce doesn’t have to be a traumatic experience. You might find you hurt less when you work together.
You and your spouse will need to discuss the basics. Who will live where? Will you keep the house or sell it? How will you share time with your children? The details of your future lives are all part of the divorce process, and working through it together can help you handle it in a mutually agreeable way.
A collaborative divorce is structured to help you do exactly that. Divorce can be a long, difficult process, but a simpler divorce is possible. Working with a group of professionals who want to see you and your spouse reach a mutual agreement can help men cope with divorce better. If you or a friend is considering divorce, contact the professionals at Best Legal Choices to learn more.